Dear Maggie,

I’m painfully shy, and just don’t do well socializing with new people. As a result, new people often think I’m snobbish or unfriendly. Now, my job, a job I love and want to keep, and one which allows me to work mostly alone, requires me to attend a yearly weekend seminar, which included meetings and lectures, but also a lot of fun, social time. That’s not where I shine. How can I seem friendly when I can’t even seem to think of anything to say most of the time?

Signed,

Friendly on the Inside

Dear Friendly,

Just that you want to be more at ease in social settings is a beginning. Wanting something is the first step in having it. So now relax and trust that the new, chatty, friendly, social-butterfly you is already in the making. Start telling yourself every day that you will find something to say to everyone you meet. And then start practicing that. Even if it’s just, “I love your shoes.” Exchanging a casual word or two with people every day will put you more and more at ease.