NORWICH – According to those who were closest to Mayor Robert Raphael Jr., he was a man with simple and endearing characteristics; but he was by no means a simple man.

Following his memorial service, family, friends, colleagues, employees, and a host of fellow citizens gathered Friday afternoon in the City of Norwich Firehouse, “The House that Bob built,” as Fire Chief John Tighe calls it, to remember all the different ways he made their lives better.

At the podium, with five pictures hanging above highlighting her husband as a leader and as friend to Norwich, Vicki Raphael, the mayor’s wife of 36 years, joyfully and tearfully recalled anecdotes from decades’ worth of memories. She spoke of their first date, dressing Bob up in ridiculous outfits for Halloween parades, playing practical jokes, and life as a family built on love, humor and selflessness. “I don’t think we ever grew up,” she said.

Many will think of Raphael as the mayor, or as a 29-year veteran of the city’s police force, but to his children Marc, Rebecca, Matthew and Michael, he was a father first. “My dad was always writing letters and sending notes,” said his son Marc, describing a time when his dad mailed his wife Rachel a pair of “jump wings” he had saved from the Army, after she broke her ankle leaping from a first story roof top during a painting mishap. “Who would think of that – my dad did.”

Raphael’s daughter Rebecca, acknowledging that there are “three million” stories about her dad, brought up a time when he cashed out some of his stock shares to help her pay for a house. “He said, ‘I would rather invest in my daughter than in the stock market,’” she said, adding that her father’s kindness and sense of humor provides an all too necessary lesson to present and future dads. “Your role is extremely important, and there is a lot that can be learned from the example of my father.”